A Tribute To Rick

Ahhh Rick..the name brings an instant smile to my lips. :)


A diverse, intelligent, sensitive, loyal, loving friend from what seems a lifetime ago, Rick is always ready to make things a little better. He's one of my best friends and confidants. Rick is the center of my tiny circle of trusted individuals. He's always close by with an encouraging word, and seems to know without fail what to do when I'm having a melt down. I sometimes tell him that he's my whisperer..which I do believe he is.


When life got tough, Rick was silently there, worrying but not intruding. Concerned but not invasive. He gave an unconditional love thats so rare these days, and still gives that unconditional love. To this day, Rick will be as gentle as a lamb when I need him to be (emotionally) but as hard as stone when I become the spoiled, insecure, jealous little brat that he alone knows I can be. The patience of a saint and the heart of a lion. That's my best friend, Rick.


It's so funny and amazing. Several times each day, I will reach for my cellphone to send a txt to him, but before I can finish composing it, (I'm a snail with texting) my phone will alert me that I have a txt, and it will be him. It's as if he can sense when I need to vent or just get a nudge and reminder that he's there. I've never seen anything like it, so maybe I should add psychic to the description of Rick.


When I'm having an insomniac moment, I can count on a call from Rick. He'll soothe me through the worries of my day and life, and with the whisperer quality that he has, will make me relax enough to get a few hours of rest. Sacrificing his own sleep time for mine. Thats my best friend, Rick.


Musically gifted, with the voice of an angel, Just listening to him sing calms my soul from deep within. I can choose a song, listen to his beautiful voice singing, and every ounce of tension slowly fades into the background, to be lost for another hour, or day. When he sings, it's as if he's singing directly to me, because of the sincerity and passion he puts in his songs. Songs sung from a caring, loving heart... That's my best friend, Rick.


I have just barely scratched the surface in trying to be articulate enough to give Rick the justice that he so deserves, but I do hope that I've conveyed something of who Rick is. In a nutshell, a caring, loving, patient soul that I'm extremely lucky to call a special special friend and person.

I love you, Rick...just for being you. Thank you for being there, and loving so unconditionally through our time. I'm not sure you'll ever realize what a special person you are, so I hope this will give you some idea of my own feelings.

For a Very Special Friend

Lead me by the hand, dear friend of mine,
Into a very special place in time..
Where time just stops but not for love,
As we look at the stars in heaven above..
And say a sweet prayer full of happiness and joy,
For the friendship we share, like a very loved toy.
A very true blessing giving life to two friends,
A love and a closeness that will know no end...
A friendship thats nurtured, Every word like brand new,
A shiny new penny, from my heart to you..
So take this new penny and hold onto it tight,
And I will be with you, every day, every night..

Caroline

Happy Birthday, Billy J. Lanza

Happy Birthday, little one.  I know if you can, you'll be listening. :)  

Love you.

This is for my brother Billy.  Even though it's been 41 years since he was taken home, it still feels like yesterday.  The injustice of losing such beautiful vibrant people so early in life.  So, Happy Birthday, Billy.   I miss you, but know you're ok.  This song is for you. <3

New Song!

At the bottom of my page, the player is holding a new song.  Please feel free to listen.  Renee and Rick, I thought about Henri and mom when I was singing this.  I know you'll understand. 

Love you both.

I Know A Gal

I know a gal who is so very special.  

The gal I know is strong, articulate.  She's a mom and a wife, a daughter and a sister. Beautiful, honest, intelligent, generous, fiercely loyal and loving of her friends.  

It feels like I've known her for years, and in a way, I have, yet we've only begun to communicate in the past 6 months.  She's my inspiration and my saving grace when I myself feel like I can't struggle through another day.  

Her name is Renee, and I love her as much as a sister, and today she turned 53.  

Renee, 

I am so honored to be able to call you my friend.  You are an absolutely amazing woman.  You're so loved and admired by all who have the wonderful fortune of meeting you or reading your words.  Your candid displays of a full gamut of emotions draw people in..captures them in a way so that they can understand a miniscule part of your very complex thoughts and feelings.  Your heart on your sleeve at times, your firey spirit in your words, always. 

When your own heart was breaking, you took the time to try to mend mine.  You drew me into your virtual arms, rocked me, yes, even sang in my ear to make me feel better, and it worked.  You help me see life so differently.  Because of you, I gain strength in my own life, and with my own deep fears.  You're always in my thoughts.   

Thank you Daisy and Henri, for giving me the wonderful gift of Renee.  

I hope you have a wonderful wonderful day today my sweet sister of the heart.  I will be thinking of you in my travels today.  

I love you! 

xoxoxo

Caroline 

*ps..I'm struggling right now with a terrible spring chest cold, but couldn't not sing a song for you.  Yes, you've heard it before, and it still stands true to this day.  You raise me up, Renee, so never forget that.  I put it in the bottom player on this page.  Love you. <3>

Pegasus

 

Oh pegasus, pegasus, where can you be? 
 Why did you fly away from me?  
With coal black eyes, that shine so bright, 
And feathered wings for graceful flight..
Up in the sky, so clear and blue,
I've always had a love for you..
In childhood dreams you always came,
You soothed my soul with your silken mane,
Your wings so soft beneath my hands,
We'd fly away to distant lands.
Among the clouds we both would soar,
I thought you were mine forevermore..
But the day came when you took to flight,
I'd search in my dreams for you each night.
But I could never find my friend,
My childhood dreams came to an end...
The mythical creatures that once flew free,
Finally flew away from me.
Oh pegasus, pegasus, where can you be?
Why did you fly away from me?

 

©2002 Caroline R Harmke

What If

What if God came unto you
And whispererd you alone,
Said "My child the time is near"
"For me to take you home"?

What if angels came your way,
And wiped away your tears?
Took you gently by the hand,
And brought you back through years..

What if all those years you saw,
Made you feel quite sad?
Would you want to take them back?
As if they were never had?

What if you could take them back,
Start all over, a life brand new,
Would you try to do it right,
Like you thought that you should do?

Well as you know, that can not be,
We can't go back through time..
To right the wrongs, that we have done..
Or fix our hearts, so blind..

So take the time that you have left,
Be gentle, kind and true..
Just try to do the best you can,
Before your time is through.

When your time has finally come,
He'll offer you his hand.
Gently leading you all the way,
And in his light you'll stand.

Circling My Head: Plucked Them Right Out Of My Head

Circling My Head: Plucked Them Right Out Of My Head

Comes The Dawn

I did not write this, but have always loved it, since the day it was sent to me.  

Comes The Dawn

Author: Veronica A. Shoffstall

After a while you learn the subtle difference

Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,

And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning 

And company doesn’t mean security,

And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts

And presents aren’t promises,

And you begin to accept your defeats

With your head up and your eyes open

With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child,

And you learn to build all your roads on today,

Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans,

And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn

That even sunshine burns if you get too much.

So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul,

Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.

And you learn that you really can endure...

That you really are strong,

And you really do have worth.

And you learn and learn...

With every goodbye you learn.

Sandcastles

Sandcastles

 

Sandcastles made by little hands,
Ever digging in the sand,
Images that childhood brings,
The Pegasus with feathered wings.

 

Skies of bluesilk,
Red Garnet Sea,
Blue Water wrapped,
Round you and me.

 

And at days end,
The tide comes in.
Sandcastles gone,
As night begins..

 

But morning comes,
Begin the day.
When little children,
Come to play.

 

They build their castles,
In the sand.
So lovingly,
With little hands.

What should it be?

I have never been able to title this poem.  Any suggestions?

There was a dream that came to me,
With golden stars in clear black skies,
And angelfish in sapphire seas.
The bright moon shining in their eyes.

 

Tidal pools with little crabs,
Ever silent in their quest,
White tigers running wild and free,
Stopping now and then to rest.

 

The sun was rising in the bay,
Reflections dancing on the shore.
I heard a soft voice gently say,
I'll be with you, forevermore.

 

I turned to see, from where it came,
This gentle voice within my ear,
And as I did, it called  my name..
I saw my angel sitting there.

 

It did not have that classic glow,
Of golden angels we long to meet,
Eyes bright as gems, hair white as snow,
With ragged clothes and calloused feet.

 

It  must have stood about four feet tall,
This little white haired entity,
As I looked at it  in awe,
It  suddenly smiled up at me.

 

A smile that warmed me deep inside,
I felt it entering my heart..
As I awakened from my dream I cried,
For fear that it would soon depart.

 

But then I realized the truth,
Of what was really meant to be.
This angel that I dreamed about,
Would always be right there with me.

You know, sometimes you meet people who really have an impact on your life.  I've had the opportunity to meet and love some very special people who have changed my life forever.  Unfortunately, they all have had one thing in common..A very dark demon called cancer.  This past year, I've lost two of those who touched not only my life, but my heart..And have met the most amazing woman who will be forever in my heart and thoughts.  

She is the daughter of one of those that lost his life to the demon this year, and amazingly, she too has cancer. Terminal, yes, but a living, breathing, feeling person.  Terminal means the disease will win, not that one is already dead.  She is articulate, fascinating, emotional, intelligent, and I am so honored to call her and her family MY extended family.  

Renee is my inspiration.  She has a blog on here called Circling My Head that is absolutely amazing and very frank about her own battle with Inflamatory Breast Cancer (IBC) and she's helped me become so strong!  I love you, Renee!  This is for you and Henri and Joseph too.

Dark Dreams

Dreams of dark forboding beasts,
Running thru my mind,
Crawling deep within my soul,
My spirit yet to find..

I crouch and hide within myself,
Afraid of what will come..
The shadows overcomming me,
I try to flee and run.

But there is nowhere I can go,
That I can not be found.
My spirit slowly turns to see,
Another tear fall down.

A tear for loss, and one for pain,
And one for selfishness..
To have to say goodbye again,
For those that I will miss.

But I will fight this darkened beast,
Until my days are done.
Along beside my sweet dear friends,
Although they may be gone.

And I will do my best to win,
The war they couldn't fight.
I'll kick and scream, claw and punch,
To fill that beast with fright.

I'll chase him into the unknown,
No mercy will there be.
And only when hes dead and gone,
I will finally be free.

Calm In The Eye Of The Storm

Natures fury knows no bounds,

She bends and sways the trees.

The stormy days and stormy nights,

She blows through with such ease.

But then she finally does subside,

Her winds turn gently warm..

And it suddenly gets quiet,

As you think you beat the storm..

But you are just within the eye,

It's only half way through.

So you seek refuge from the wrath,

What else is there to do?

So step inside, to sit a spell.

Relax, be safe and warm.

Leave your worries at the door,

The Calm In The Eye Of The Storm.